FF Zozo Snack

Today’s post features my 30lb cat making derp faces as he tries to eat some flowers.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  Learn more about it in my FAQ.See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here.

wordlust  America isn’t a melting pot. It’s more of a chocolate-covered calzone full of chicken wings.

MagpieLibrarian  the little engine who couldn’t even

annetdonahue  IS DONALD TRUMP’S HAIR A HORCRUX YES OR NO

rstevens  But here’s my flavor /So call me Fieri

MrWordsWorth  You can always tell the people who ate too much at the state fair by the giant stick protruding from their asses.

clowndro  Stick a fork in me, I am into that

FBSisnothere  I see your sports reference I don’t understand and raise you a song lyric from a band you’ve never heard of.

DrWrought  google+ just asked whether I know my mother. wouldn’t this be awkward if I didn’t

13spencer  The people in Florida are more frightening than the alligators.

robfee  Disney gave me a very unrealistic expectation on the amount of dogs and/or monkeys I would see playing in major sporting events.

prettysadmostly  love is out there somewhere and when i find it its going to do all the laundry

TheDairylandDon  make up your minds, waffle cones

samfbiddle  personally I wish that instead of reporting upsetting things that happen in the world we had more videos of ted cruz doing cartoon voices

kevinseccia  Figuring out which hand towel to use in a friend’s cluttered bathroom is probably the closest I’ll ever get to negotiating a minefield.

TheMichaelRock  I’ve seen a lot of weird shit on twitter, but the Google+ link I just saw in someone’s bio took it to a whole new level.

VaguelyFunnyDan  It’s 2015 and a leading Presidential candidate is answering the women’s issues question by pointing out that he arranges beauty pageants.

theshamingofjay  It’s okay dress socks, I give up halfway during the day too.

k_hoff99  Just because you’re garbage doesn’t mean you can’t do great things. It’s called a garbage can, not a garbage cannot.

Chumpstring  ME: [spins the Price is Right wheel] DREW: good luck buddy! u wanna say hi to someone? ME: [stares into the camera awhile] nah.

louisvirtel Cargo shorts say, “I’m a nice guy with nothing to hide except an entire Discman.”

ImAmandaNelson  WHY WON’T THIS SEMI-COLON BECOME A COMMA oh that’s mustard on my screen: a memoir

owlparliament  ayyyy boy are you a mentholated muscle ointment because I wanna rub you all over my butt

andrewmorrisey  Congratulations rainbow, you’ve passed with flying colors.

ModernSauce  Good thing about not understanding finance is that it’s just another terrible Monday for me! Wheeee! *thinks about potatoes for three hours*

jessokfine  Going to start referring to my lady bits as my “niche”

amydillon  I don’t care what the calendar says, summer is officially over when the soles of my flip flops finish disintegrating.

robfee  “Wiz Khalifa got arrested while high, riding a hoverboard at the airport” sounds like the solution to the greatest game of Clue of all time.

WBKnoblock  Country music is right there in between the sound of being stabbed in the ear and that super low note that makes you shit yourself.

ProfessorSnack  Pics or you didn’t eat it.

FatChickinLA  Donald Trump’s political style is a mix of Nixon’s Southern Strategy and WWE bad guy wrestler script.

markleggett  A moist towelette is a female moist towel.

paulverhoeven  Friend has a puppy and asked for a term to describe stepping in the same poop you haven’t cleaned yet AGAIN. I yelled “BROWNHOG DAY”.

aliciahiggison  In an interview, when they ask me something I’m not good at, I can confidently answer: “Picking the right size Tupperware for leftovers.”

fart  saw an old guy w a shirt that said “with a body like this, who needs hair?” but he was NOT BALD. so now i know too much about his pube sitch

TeeJayRush  Ladies, if he says he wants you to have his children, make sure he’s not talking about dropping them off at your house the next day

kerihw  sorry that at the moment of climax a) I shouted “three points to gryffindor!” and b) i only gave u three points

papasuncle  Scotch tape is just regular tape that has been aged in oak barrels for at least 3 years.

SarNobz  Financial status: stuck a stick of incense in a cherry tomato.

maureenjohnson  My editor had to talk me out of eating a whole bunch of bees because I wanted to experience Buzzfeed.

Jedimasterbator  “If I could have one, and only one, superpower I’d choose the Soviet Union.” #overheardatstarbucks

wallacs  The worst thing about driving to Ohio is that when you finally get there, you’re in Ohio.

onedumbshark  WEDDING CEREMONY TIP: Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue; something fleek, one canoe, some risotto, deja vu.

sannewman  If I could have dinner with anyone, living or dead, I’d choose Antonin Scalia, dead.

emiiillllyyyy  I have 2 boys, Thaniel is 85 months & Blandon just turned 53 months. We’re still nursing. Nothing comes out but it calms my urge to shoplift

TheWoodenslurpy  If tough love doesn’t work, try gentle hate.

trumpetcake  “Well that’s showbiz!” I say, desperately pointing to a dusty old hose and praying this time I’ve guessed right.

HelloCullen  You should see the other guy. Specifically, how good at fighting he is.

SortaBad  *guy shows me his Chinese character tattoo* “It means wisdom” *I show him a Batman BandAid on my arm* “It means I was brave at the doctor”

LizHackett  You’re a busy woman. Let the smoke alarm tell you when the chicken’s done.

TheWoodenslurpy Your secrets are safe with me because I literally won’t remember them. This also applies to your birthday. Your birthdays are safe with me.

Little Big's Tweet of the Week

goldengateblond  chocolate so rich it thinks it can run for president even though it’s an idiot

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  Learn more about it in my FAQ.See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here.

Snapshot 08.26.15

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–Elias appears to have caught a cold, poor thing. This is really going to test my cold-prevention-preparedness, as getting sick is now dangerous for me as I’m on immuno-suppressant injections for my Crohn’s disease. I’m nervous but especially with school back in session and autumn on its way, it was bound to happen, and I may as well fine-tune my germ-prevention system.

–Our neighbors have a new kitten, Louie, and he desperately wants to come live with us. He is constantly in our yard and makes several attempts to sneak into our house on a daily basis. We have to fish him out from a bedroom about once a day. We aren’t opposed to his presence, and in fact Isobel and Elias love it, but I’m worried one of our grown cats will give him a beating for encroaching on their territory. He is the sweetest little guy and in addition to sneaking in our house he loves to get into our garage and help himself to our cat food. He wouldn’t leave us alone when I was taking Isobel’s first day of school photos, so eventually she just picked him up so he could be in the picture, too. He almost went along with us for the ride to school this morning, too.

–My pal Sarah RP recently sent us a box of wonderful goodies for the kids, and since she is an LB reader she packaged a bunch of stickers into a cow insemination glove (and sent along a few extra for good measure). Anthony and I cracked up so hard. Now if you search this website for the phrase “cow insemination glove” you will find more than one result. I’m here to please.

–Good news! Elias has learned how to play the pot lids like cymbals! He is definitely developing down a different, more action-oriented path than Isobel’s verbal one. He spends all his time trying to find a thing to hit other things with. He is so much more active. He’s going to wear me out.

–I got to cross another item off the life list this weekend and hang out with Modesto’s own Bonnie, intrepid homemaker and baker extraordinaire. She is as beautiful in spirit as she is in person, and she gave me one of her delicious loaves to take home with me. It made the most wonderful open-faced grilled cheese sandwiches.

–Anthony worked late into the night on a work project almost every night last week, and I am still recovering from all the solo parenting. I was so deeply exhausted that sometime during the week I asked my mother in law if she’d be willing to take both kids for awhile on Saturday so that Anthony and I could have honest-to-goodness alone time. I think we’ve had true alone time once since Elias has been born, and he’s about a year and a half now. I was worried we had forgotten how to be together, just the two of us, but I shouldn’t have. It was so wonderful we are going to try to fit in more weekend afternoon dates.

–After we dropped off the kids in Modesto, Anthony and I noticed some signs that looked very familiar–my friend Carrie had set up an estate sale just two blocks down from Grandma and Grandpa’s. We had to stop and take a look. Though it wasn’t that late in the day it was pretty much picked through already, but I did find several of the items I wrote about last week in the Best Craft Supplies To Look For While Thrifting. It felt like confirmation from the Universe that I haven’t lost my thrifting edge.

FF First Grade.

The Best Craft Supplies To Look For While Thrifting.

Snapshot 08.19.15.

FF Backyard Swimming.

13-year-old explains why intersectionality matters. I have something in my eye.

Sadie would like to announce a general strike.

This is maybe the greatest thing that’s ever been uploaded to the internet. Anthony and I almost woke up the kids because I showed this to him in bed.

I really love the every color twitter bot.

U Up?

Skybutt delivers on its promise.

When u are content with ur moisture levels cuz ur flesh omits lipid secretions from ur cutaneous gland.

Sabrina’s done it again.

NOBODY EVER HELPS AROUND THIS HOUSE.

Join me on this Shamecation.

The internet, in two tweets.

When you can’t find the cardigan you want to wear today.

We can’t stop here. This is bat Count-ry.

Dylan is a senior. A senior with a spelling book.

When u actin tough but realize u better start clownin before u get knocked out.

The moon is so beautiful tonight. reminds me of a short film i saw as a child.

What a time to be alive.

How to talk to someone with chronic pain or illness.

RIP Yvonne Craig, who made two generations of nerds fall in love with an asskicking librarian. She was Isobel’s favorite. :(

NIPPERS! DIY Catnip Toys. Catnip Shrimp is probably my favorite.

DIY Wasp from the Avengers Halloween Costume.

Recipe: Zephyr Summer Squash Bake.

Recipe: Lunchbox Cheese Sandwich Spread.

 

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