In honor of my sweet, sweet Isobel’s third birthday last Wednesday, this Follow Friday is dedicated to some of my favorite photos of her as a baby. Have a great weekend!
What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further. Learn more about it in my FAQ. See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here.
joshjs Every time you say “bazinga”, a laugh track gets its wings.
SarahIvy Yesterday I put on a fake mustache and Finn burst into tears. He didn’t stop crying until I let him put it in the garbage.
donni Wonder who my cat’s always talking to on his little cat cellphone.
BeTheBoy Whenever my wife says “This may be the booze talking” I regret shopping at that haunted liquor store.
sarabethw There’s a State Farm commercial I really like. That makes me feel old.
lifeserial Is Mozilla Firefox one of the characters from Hunger Games?
EvenMoreSarah Guacamole delivery. Why is there not this.
That_Biz It was just my luck that my water would break on April Fool’s day and I’d have to call my husband at work and convince him it was legit.
Kimmittable I bought this house about 8 years ago. Today, I sorted out the pantry.
ALLCAPSCHANNEL WHY? BECAUSE CAPITAL LETTERS COST THE SAME AS SMALL LETTERS. THAT’S FUCKING WHY.
stevelibrarian Best part of your birthday month beginning is the start of all the birthday coupons.
antigone_spit Jesus loves you but Odin thinks you’re worthless.
elliemce Wearing polka-dots is a good way to indicate that you are non-threatening to other species.
NicLewis “That’s not very pinteresting.” – The most common last known words for 2013.
fierceflawless “Who want to go on a field trip… to the GROCERY STORE?” It sounds cooler when you say it like that.
ordermeanother There is no greater cartoon than Animaniacs. Thusly there are few greater joys than showing your son Amimaniacs.
Patheticist I’m on ancestry.com tracing my family tree path to one of the lotto winners.
mikeleffingwell I feel like a great dad when my kids watch PBS for 6 hours.
benschwartzy I’m hoping the Mega Millions winner is a Muslim illegal immigrant in a hoodie who spends it all on contraception.
BridgetCallahan I’d like to point out to the powers that be, I’d get a lot more evil done if I had some cash yo.
MrWordsWorth Movie idea: Adam West and William Shatner play each other. And they fight crime.
FakeAPStylebook The correct spelling is “Rocktober,” not “Roctober,” which is the month of giant birds.
alwysabridesmd When I win Megamillions my dream of bulldozing my house and turning the lot into a rootin’ tootin’ cat ranch will be realized.
notoriousjwc “Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.” ~H. L. Mencken
Leemanish “GOD, DAD! YOU’RE SUCH A HUGE FASCIST!” -Caitlin Mussolini
shaneswinnea Just found out that Game of Thrones isn’t a euphemism for diarrhea.
trumpetcake “One ticket to Bonerville, please!” has yet to make the token booth clerk laugh.
ordermeanother I’m having a good mustache day.
morgan_murphy “This is why we can’t have nice things.” – God, looking at us
MassageByTed The whole day ahead of me. Do I start eating a car or take up serpents?
mackymoo The St. Patrick’s Day decorations in this Mexican restaurant are nice.
neiltyson Don’t Christian monks wear hoodies?
JRehling A dog’s goal is to stand on Mt. Everest and see the whole world flooded with his urine. Then raise his leg and mark that last dry spot.
TwoAdults Stop the motherscratching presses! My Target now carries whole, spiral sliced hams! My two loves meet.
NicLewis If it isn’t the announcement of Robin Hood: Men In Tights II, I’m not sure I want to hear it.
thebryanpaulk Got a follow from Leeds Mattress Store. Don’t hesitate to send me nude photos in exchange for a 30% discount on bed skirts and dust covers.
jillsmo Hubs: “Why are you not in bed?” Child 1: “Because…… RUN!!!” *runs away*
dena33 Pro tip: Don’t take that large thing that you can’t really see in the dark out of your dog’s mouth with your bare hands.
NicLewis Hoarder of the Flies. #MessyMovies
DrSalsaPants Rosemary’s Scabies #MessyMovies
WinterLightHome Planes, Trains, and Car Sickness #MessyMovies
DrSalsaPants Pus In Boots #MessyMovies
sarcasmically “Fuck riches, get honey.” -gangsta Winnie The Pooh
joevelouria I don’t know why a computer mouse is called a “mouse” other than the fact that it’s edible.
anymommy: My record for one Dora episode is: 3 emails, laundry, shower, You?
Leemanish My 5 favorite things are: picnics, rainbows, candy canes, waterfalls, & unicorns – BUT NOT NECESSARILY IN THAT ORDER!
That_Biz We’re watching The Muppets Movie, except, Sam thinks its about muffins and she’s a bit disappointed.
introvertedwife I think I’m gonna end every sentence today with “and then a motorcycle went through my shed.”
pistolval went in on a lotto ticket at work. if i win, have decided to have myself taxidermied and stuffed with my money.
biorhythmist I hate it when the autoflush toilet goes off before I can take the picture.
theleanover I should probably get up soon but I’ve got some good bedsores going.
MmeSurly Fuck everything that isn’t a muffin. Or. Fuck a muffin. Who cares, really. It’s your choice.
blueloggy I woke up w/ a tiny splinter in the back of my hand. Which is to blame: sleep-carpentry or wood-sprites?
joevelouria Reese is pregnant?! I sure hope she names her kid Pieces.
Toaster_Pastry I think we all have unrealized special powers or talents. Mine is spooning.
LaurelKS I’m trying to look on the bright side of this empty apartment weekend. So I’m spending it pantsless.
JohnFugelsang Paula Deen reacts to Diabetes by embracing healthy organic plant-based diet. Aw, just kiddin.’ She’s gonna sell pills.
ghweldon “Bray before hay.” – Thug donkey.
JoeVelouria I like my men like I like my dementia. What? Oh look! A Japanese fighter jet. Let’s flush it down the toilet, Sarge.
shelldash I’m searching for a new gynecologist… Hoping to find one who thinks outside the box.
Soulsmithy Amazing how a single Dell printer can turn my workday into an absurdist fairytale.
trumpetcake T.G.I.F.*!!!! *Tell (my boss) Gary I Fell (down a well)
happyrobot If I was president I would have photos of my cat on the table behind my desk.
jlweinberg After talking to my husband for five minutes I realized he thought I was talking to the dog.
Smethanie When someone tells me they weren’t born yesterday, I’m relieved because I was really worried newborns nowadays are giant assholes.
SisterWhitloe Honk if you love peace and quiet.
MeganBoley I hope J enjoys my texts about toddler farts while he is in court being professional.
shariv67 Either someone has the tag “Sorry” or Canada has the most polite graffiti I’ve ever seen.
trumpetcake I wouldn’t go as far as calling myself an EXPERT in self-defense, but I’ve hit more than one bandit in the wiener.
LouisPeitzman And it’s a question I find myself asking more often than I’d like to admit—”Am I bleeding?”
CelebrityChez My therapist told me that he thought I was cured today. That is either really good news or perhaps he noticed that I was dressed as a ham.
shiraselko Hibers gonna nate.
morninggloria The song told me to shake what my mamma gave me, so I shook my work ethic around.
Sondeera You know, I find I like my job a lot more when I drug my coworkers
sgnp My wife suggested I stay home and play Skyrim all day. Can’t tell if she was sarcastic, working an angle, or is simply a wonderful person.
FaisalAdam_ My idea of a perfectly ingenious evil plan is to go on a worldwide live TV broadcast and yawn.
UnicornFlavored Zoey talks about trucks now. Or, as she says, “fucks”. Endless entertainment.
allisonthemeep Toddler is running around saying, “Good morning!” and making my heart grow. Which could be really dangerous, the enlarged heart thing.
JennyJohnsonHi5 “There’s always next year.” – What I think Rick Perry will say when he is not elected to be the GOP candidate
JulieFredericks Flavor Flav looks just like an old mummy at this point. I can easily see him wrapped in linens, clutching an amulet in repose. Boyyyeeee!
TequilaTears Eating in a McDonald’s is like eating in prison. There are unwritten rules. Don’t look anyone in the eyes & the knives are for killing only.
jlweinberg I would quietly urinate into my pants rather than move and wake the sleeping baby.
owlparliament If you’re on the fence about family planning, I encourage you to visit your local dollar store.
mikeleffingwell Shake what yo mama gave you! Unless she just handed you a baby.
JRehling Ron Paul’s rabid support is due, in large part, to rabies.
SaraSantiago Today felt like everyone was being kind of an asshole. Especially me. I was the best asshole.
badbanana Of the most inconvenient ways to rent a movie, Redbox is the most convenient.
FlyoverJoel My coworker is drinking from a Star Trek coffee mug and wearing a red shirt today. I’m really going to miss her.
What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further. Learn more about it in my FAQ. See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here..